The Whole Wide World

Sunday, again. Last night’s Pride party was pretty entertaining. I stayed up and out with the crowd until 1:30AM. I even danced(!) Sometimes it was awkward as could be and sometimes I felt completely free. I suppose that is progress. There were a handful of songs that I could just close my eyes and pretend like I was in my own room with no one else there and just dance without caring. They were all songs from around the time I was in or just out of college and so I think that made all the difference. I used to dance under the influence of liquid courage and also, knowing all the words helped. That backed up the point that was made last week that Americans typically dance to songs where they can shout and sing the words as well. I think it just helps to be focusing on the words and staying out of the worrying what other people are thinking zone.

The roast had highs and lows…everyone was a good sport, some of the jokes didn’t land, but some were super funny. Things get pretty wild down here. I’ll leave it at that…There were some really good drag outfits and lots of glitter and sparkles. I glittered up and made a rainbow name tag that said ‘Hello, My Name Is ManMarie’. Our summer executive chef, always used to confuse me the Mary Ann that worked in the kitchen and there was one time when he went to call me Mary Ann, but caught himself and it ended up coming out as Man Marie, so it was perfect for last night.

Nothing too exciting to report on today. Brunch, which is always a nice change. Today’s highlight being seared Ahi tuna. Yum. Long store hours, but a couple of volunteers working with me, which allowed me to be productive in the stock room and the office. This week will be busy with Mid-Winter dinners on Friday and Saturday. I’ve been on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster lately, and today brought some peace on that front. I don’t know if I will ever be able to fully articulate what it is like down here, it’s just unlike any other experience I’ve ever had. Sometimes in a bad way and sometimes in a good way. A phrase that got tossed around a lot in the summer season was ‘trauma bonding’ and I think that is still accurate to a degree in the winter, although Stewie life was its own beast. It’s certainly going to be an interesting adjustment stepping back into the non frozen world when the time comes.